Will No Contact Work After Begging?

By Savva Smith
Man kneels kissing girl's boot
An image of 5 golden stars


Can the No Contact Strategy Overcome Past Begging Attempts?


You will learn:

How to efficiently mitigate the damage caused by begging, ensuring that your no contact phase is as swift as possible
The psychological impact of begging on your ex
The importance of subjective value in relationships and how it impacts the chances of winning an ex back
Navigating the emotional hurricane after a relationship ends can feel like sailing through uncharted waters.

You're left adrift, grappling with intense emotions, and the longing to win back your ex becomes overwhelming.

It's all too easy to find yourself in a state of desperation, resorting to begging - a strategy that often causes more harm than good.

If this resonates with you, know that you're not alone.

Together, we'll discover how, even if you've found yourself pleading for reconciliation in the past, no contact can rebuild your position of strength and restore your perceived value in the eyes of your ex.

This isn't just a guide; it's a shared journey, a map charted by my own experience and enlightened by the lessons I've learned along the way.

So, settle in and join me as we navigate this journey together.

Trust in the transformative magic of no contact, for it can guide you to a new beginning, restoring hope and bringing peace amidst the storm:

Inside the mind of your ex when you beg

Gorgeous ginger girl thinking
Understanding the psychological impact of begging on your ex is crucial to realizing why no contact is a way to go.

When you desperately ask your ex to return, you unintentionally reduce your own allure, diminishing your personal charm in their eyes.

Let's peek into the mind of your ex and unearth what really transpires when you're asking them for a second chance:

1. Perceived desperation: Even if you remain calm and composed while begging, your ex will likely perceive your actions as desperate. Desperation can be a significant turn-off, as it highlights your emotional dependence on the relationship. This will make your ex feel more in control, reducing their motivation to reunite with you.

2. Lowered subjective value: Begging will lead your ex to view you as having a lower subjective value. When you plead with someone to come back to you, you're essentially admitting that you cannot live without them. This makes you appear weak and dependent, which is unattractive. By maintaining a strong position and not begging, you can preserve your subjective value and increase your chances of winning your ex back.

3. Eroding respect: When you beg for your ex's return, you risk losing their respect. A relationship built on mutual respect is essential for a healthy and long-lasting partnership. By begging, you undermine the respect your ex once had for you, making it even more challenging to repair the relationship.

4. Reinforcing their decision: Begging will inadvertently strengthen your ex's decision to end the relationship. When they see you in a weakened state, they might feel justified in their choice to break up. This can make it more difficult for them to reconsider their decision and come back to you.

5. Potential for manipulation: When you beg, you risk opening the door to manipulation. Your ex may take advantage of your vulnerability and use it to control you or dictate the terms of a potential reconciliation. This can result in an unhealthy and imbalanced relationship dynamic, further hindering the chances of a successful reunion.
How begging affects your relationship infographic
Reflecting on these psychological consequences helps illuminate why begging often backfires.

But now comes the pivotal question: how can we mend your bruised self-esteem, reignite the extinguished spark, and rewrite your narrative?

That's where our journey into the realm of no contact begins.

Can No Contact Work After Begging?

Man in a classic suit kneeling before the girl begging her to come back
When you've resorted to pleading in previous interactions with your ex, they naturally develop certain expectations.

They come to anticipate another wave of desperate messages from you.

Now, visualize a scenario where you decide to initiate your "no contact" phase again, but this time, the dynamics evolve differently.

They wait for your messages, but none arrive.

They brace for the flood of your desperation, but it's nowhere to be seen.

You might wonder what's going on in their head? Drawing from my extensive experience, having observed countless such dynamics, they'll ponder, "Could I have been mistaken about them?".

This shift in perspective can enhance the way they perceive you, making you appear more intriguing.

Subsequently, the balance of power that may have tilted in their favor begins to lean towards you.

And the beauty of it all?

You're not undertaking any extravagant gestures.

Instead, you're merely reinstating your no contact phase, acting as if the past never occurred.

Throughout my coaching career, I've experimented with myriad strategies - sending handwritten letters, thoughtful gifts, or even persuasive messages.

Yet, none have consistently outperformed the simple act of adhering to the "no contact" principle.

It doesn't matter if it's your second or third attempt at "no contact."

The key is genuine dedication to the process.

This not only amplifies your desirability but also progressively reshapes your ex-partner's valuation of your worth.

Keep in mind, rekindling attraction and restoring the balance is a gradual process.

Results may not be immediate, but with time, they will materialize.


Key Points

Begging does not address the root cause of a breakup and can have negative consequences, such as lowering your perceived value and eroding respect in the eyes of your ex
No contact is an effective strategy for reestablishing your strong position and increasing your subjective value, even after begging
To successfully repair a relationship, focus on personal growth and address the actual reasons for the breakup instead of resorting to begging

Not knowing this astonishing secret practically guarantees the negative experience during no contact:
Not feeling any better
Having relentless thoughts of an ex
Battling those near-impossible-to-resist urges to reach out