1. Remove the reminders completely
Any reminder of them, be it their belongings, clothing, or photographs, can and will trigger a wave of nostalgia when you least expect it. One day you'll start feeling better, but the next day you stumble upon their T-shirt, and - just like that - you're back to feeling as if it's the first day post-breakup again, maybe even worse. You might think you've regressed, but you haven't, of course. So, if you haven't done this already, pack everything you have from them into a box, and give it to a friend, a relative, or place it in storage away from your home. Do it now to save your emotions later.2. Do not monitor your ex
Keeping tabs on them will hinder your progress. Sometimes, it's even more damaging than physical reminders because it's like watching a movie unfold. They're doing things, posting photos, showcasing their seemingly perfect new life - and you're no longer part of it. Each time you view your ex's social media, it hurts, if not immediately, then certainly a few days later.
Your mind will start obsessing over the things you notice. Even harmless incidents can trigger your doubts. You may see someone on your ex's friend list and instantly become anxious. You find yourself wanting to take immediate action to win them back, trying to resolve an impossible task again that only causes pain.
If you're not one of these people, that's great. But if you are, there's no need for shame. Sometimes, the pull is too strong to resist. If it's difficult for you, a practical approach would be to remove them from your social media recommendations. I wouldn't suggest blocking them
, as the desire to unblock them later might create unnecessary thoughts about them. These thoughts elevate their perceived value, and you find yourself anxious again. Don't let this moment of weakness stop you from being strong.
So, why do people revert to thinking about their exes and start checking their social media? It's because they haven't been advised by their coaches that the key to healing during no contact is to continuously work on shifting your emotional focus away from the past relationship. This holds true whether or not you want to get your ex back. Why? Because winning an ex back
essentially means establishing a new, entirely different relationship. To achieve this, you have to erase the old relationship from your mind. This is the priority. It's not just about refraining from texting or calling your ex. It's about shifting your focus. It's about overcoming the withdrawal symptoms post-breakup, which are similar to addiction withdrawal.
So, how can we accomplish this? Because this is the key to a speedy post-breakup recovery.