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6 MIN READ

What Is No Contact?

S. Smith
Relationship Psychology Tactician

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The Path to Quick Recovery and Reduced Stress Levels

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You will learn:

What is no contact and how it works
How to speed up the recovery process, reduce stress levels, and take control of your own life and emotions after a breakup
How can you use no contact to get your ex back
Breaking up is hard, and the emotional turmoil that comes with it can be overwhelming. Sometimes, the pain is unbearable and it seems that it will never go away...That's where no contact comes in.

No contact algorithm to forget your ex...and make them miss you

Brunette man sits near his computer display thinking in the darkness

No contact is a simple strategy that allows you to take a step back, focus on yourself and your own healing, and ultimately move on faster. By implementing no contact, you're removing the negative influences and toxic dynamics of the relationship from your life, which can be a huge relief and reduce stress levels. It allows you to take control of your life and emotions, rather than allowing your ex to dictate them. The basic algorithm of no contact can be described as follows:

1
Remove any legitimate reasons for them to reach out. If you owe them money - give them back. If you have common belongings or anything that reminds you of your ex, send them via courier service.
2
Do not text them. Do not call them. Even if it's their birthday
3
Do not watch their social media profiles. But - do not block them.
4
Shift your emotional focus away from this particular relationship (we have a whole set of exercises to speed up this step). The goal is to reduce your ex's subjective value in your eyes.
5
When they reach out, you can respond in a neutral way. There's also an option to transform your no-contact into the ignoring strategy.
6
When they demonstrate a sincere desire to get back to you, you can invite them to your place,
and the reunion is only possible when it's on your terms and conditions.
You can start your self-recovery journey with even this basic description, though the devil is in the details, of course. No contact is one of the most powerful self-care and self-respect choices. It's about taking the time to heal and not allowing your ex to have power over your emotions and well-being. It's about prioritizing yourself and your own healing.

It's worth considering no contact if you're struggling to move on after a breakup, or if you want to get your ex back. The benefits in terms of faster recovery and reduced stress levels are worth it in the long run.

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Why no contact is the most natural response to a breakup

A person walks across the desert alone
No contact is the most natural way to remove negative influences and make space for people who demonstrated their inability to see your true worth. It's about taking control of your own life and emotions. If they do not see your value, why would you contact them? To explain to them that they're making a mistake? If you're here, it's likely that you've already tried it, and it didn't work.

When you're in a relationship, it's not a rare case when your partner might become a central part of your life and your daily routine. An end to such a relationship is likely to leave you feeling confused and lost. But, instead of holding on to what's gone, no contact allows you to quickly recover your former strength and independence. It gives you the space to process the end of the relationship, without the constant reminders and distractions that contact with your ex would bring.

No contact is an empowering choice that helps you to take back control of your own life and emotions. It allows you to set boundaries and establish your own sense of self-worth. It means that you're not waiting around for your ex to come back, or constantly checking in to see if they're thinking about you. Instead, you're taking charge of your own life, healing, and moving forward. It's about valuing and respecting yourself enough to let go of what isn't working for you and to make room for something better.

Also, if you want to get your ex back, no contact helps you increase your subjective value in their eyes, raising your attractiveness.

The best way to make their hearts grow fonder

A man and a woman hugging on a beach during sunset
By implementing no contact, you're not only removing yourself from the negative influences and toxic dynamics of the relationship, but you're also giving your ex the opportunity to miss you.

If you truly believe that your ex is the right one for you and you want to give them the opportunity to realize what they've lost, no contact is one of the best options. It allows you to take a step back, and focus on yourself and your own healing. Only when you truly disappear from their life, your ex will be able to experience nostalgia and miss you.
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Key Points

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No contact is a natural response to a breakup and can help remove negative influences from your life
When implemented properly, no contact speeds up the recovery process and reduces stress/anxiety levels
If you want to recover your relationship and get your ex back, no contact is one of the options. To get them back you'll have to show them what this means to live in the world without your love and care.
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